Monday, September 14, 2009

Talk with who?

You should talk with someone! really and what should I tell this someone…that I am sad that my daughter is not like your daughter…that my daughter could have been amazing…and now she will only be amazing for a Down Syndrome child…that when she rolls over it is brilliant…not just expected…should I tell this person that I am scared that I am not doing everything I can for my little girl… and if I do not do enough…she will not be the best she can be…that she will live with me forever…instead of being independent…should I tell this person…that I hate feeling inadequate as a mother, as a wife and as a human being…should I tell them how much I hate how I have lost myself through this…not just having a child with special needs but as a person that thought she could do and survive anything…should I tell this person that I am scared my little girl is going to die…or that I am scared to let my son leave the house in fear I may lose him…should I tell this person…they cannot possibly know what I am going through because they have never lived my life…that the problem with talking with that someone…is they do not get it and cannot get it…and I know it…I guess it is Monday!

5 comments:

  1. Damn, I wish we lived near each other. I know what you are going through.

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  2. I've been thinking about you, where you are at emotionally. I wish there was something I could tell you to make it better.

    I wrote a post this morning based on what you got me thinking about yesterday.

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  3. I am doing better today...I cried most of the night...it is hard realize that I am not going to wake up one day..and make her ok..I am more upset that she can get sick at any time...that she is always beig judged on how big or small..how she just cannot be maddox but a kid with downs..I am scared for her to get made fun of..but emotionally it is a better day..thank you for you support...I need any advice!

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  4. This is Joyce. Sending hugs your way. This road is certainly not an easy one, but I can share that with twenty years behind me now, I wish I had spent a little less time worrying in the early years. Try to just enjoy each and every moment.

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  5. My 56 year old sister in law is a Down's person. We have learned to chalk up the 'staring' in public to just plain old curiosity. Susie is social and happy most of the time although she does have premature dementia. She has been a beloved family member for many years.

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