Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Maddie's Normal...
When I heard my child was going to be born with Down Syndrome…I thought just maybe…she wont be…that it was a mistake…not that she is a mistake just the reality of Down Syndrome…then I thought maybe just maybe my baby will be ahead of the curve! She will be the smartest and fastest…both cognitively and motor skill wise…then I thought maybe just maybe she will not have the predominant features of Down Syndrome…she turned out to be the cutest thing since sliced cheese! and maybe just maybe she will not have the health issues that comes with Down Syndrome…lets face it…I am bummed that we are starting to see delays…I just thought that if I worked really hard that this would not happen…I thought that if I read all about it…and made sure I knew everything and I got the best people to work with her…that she would be “normal”…she is not…and I am frustrated…this is where I say she is “normal” for Maddie…
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I truly love your honesty. Your words echo deep within me, but have long since been let go. I so understand your thoughts and wishes and feelings. I honestly thought those exact same things... maybe he won't have it, maybe he'll be ahead of the rest, maybe people won't even notice he has Ds... blah blah blah. These are all valid thoughts and feelings... but one day you'll look back and you won't see Ds anymore and it won't matter that she has it anyway, cuz you're so darned proud of her every accomplishment. I still get a stab every now and then when JM's little (typical)buddy that just turned 2 says all kinds of things and we're just happy if he even says an approximation of a word. But your precious daughter will do all those things, too. Enjoy the ride... I'm enjoying hearing about her.
ReplyDeleteI have to tell you I thought all those same maybies and came to the same conclusions... All part of letting go of something we've been trying hard to hold on tight to, I suppose.
ReplyDeleteLately it seems like there is this big push to be the one who gets over it right away, who embraces it, glorifies it, beautifies it... as quickly as possible... with no down time, no raw time. Vis-a-vis that movement, I just want to say that I love your blog, your honesty, your progression though this life changing experience. You are the real deal and it is refreshing to know you (online anyway).
ReplyDeleteBtw, you've inspired another of my posts.
ReplyDelete