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Hi my name is Kim and I am a recovering bigot and ignorant sole…once was the day I agreed abortion was a woman choice…sole choice…once was ...

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Rage on...

I am ok…I keep telling myself that…if it does not bother Maddie…then why should it get me…Maddie has been passed officially in ALL milestones by a 10 ½ month old…he is saying mama, dada, hot, up, etc…he signs, he eats big food, he has teeth, and he walks…he knows where I keep things and out of sight does not mean out of mind with this kiddo…I am not surprised…I have known this was going to happen…I have watched “it” inching closer and closer…but to see it happen…there it is and now it is gone…I am not comparing…because I cannot compare…there is nothing to compare to…he has done it and mastered it…she is still working on it…I knew this was not a good idea…me having a baby in the house so close to Maddie…I knew this day would come…but I thought my child would be different…I thought my child was above the curve…I thought just maybe she would continue to meet her milestones on the developmental chart…I was wrong…yes…she is meeting them for Maddie…and that is the easiest feel good for you comment there is…it is on Maddie time…Maddie will do it…Maddie is great for Maddie…yep…that is right…but it does not make this competitive mom feel better…it makes me roll my eyes and just think…will it always be this way…will I continue to see her fall behind…when will she understand this…and how will we handle it…today Maddie was crawling as fast as she could with her head down and a wiggle in her butt…she looked at me and smiled and then pushed him down and took his toy…I guess that is how we will get though this…Maddie will rage on and I will cheer!


  1. Yes, you are right about "Maddie" time! I often say that about Kristen. It is very hard to watch the delays come. I know. BUT, Maddie will do everything too! When she does, it will be sweeter than ever imaginable! Keep working at things...that is what we do. I take that energy, that sad watch other kids pass my kid up energy, and I focus it on what can we do to get to the next milestone...next step! Oh, as I have said to many others and written in my blog, patience. That is the biggest and hardest lesson Kristen continues to teach me daily :)!

  2. Maddie makes me laugh, lol...I feel those emotions with certain things. We are not around ANY kids Russells age so I never have that direct comparison. I took him to that daycare once to visit and it didnt bother me that kids his age were doing more things...BUT...When I hear about my friends who have kids exactly Russells age, when I see pictures of what they are doing...For some reason THAT stings...That makes me feel bad. I have to admit I havnt done well in dealing with those emotions, I have let some friendships go because its just easier not to see or deal with it...sigh...I guess I wish I had some advice, but I dont.

  3. I was actually thinking about you the other day and was a little jealous that she gets to be around another kiddo all the time so close to her age. I remember learning in grad school what an advantage that can be to development. I have debated whether to let Es go to daycare at least 1x a week just for the interaction with kiddos her age. Kids learn best by example. You are blessed to have him there. I know it's hard to see, but you are. He is going to encourage her so much!!
    Maddie is an individual and unique! It's obvious you're a proud mama. :))