my Health...

Normal…it is my favorite word and the one word I strive to be…granted it is only MY normal…not anyone else’s…so when I went to the doctors office and they said I had high blood pressure it pissed me off…me…NO not me…I am healthy and I do not want to take a pill for the rest of my life…it is to much of a commitment and I hate commitment…so anyway after a month of pouting…I went in for a second reading…sure enough it was high…then I was REALLY pissed…so I had to go see another doctor…no really another doctor…so I self medicated like anyone and ate a lot of M&M’s with pretzels in them…they were YUMMY! By the end of the BIG bag I no longer cared if I had high blood pressure and that I would do what it takes to be healthy for my babies…so I went to the next doctor…and NO high blood pressure…yep…NORMAL!! yes I am normal…seems I have a bit of anxiety when it comes to the doctor that told me my baby was not going to be born healthy…I knew I was a bit anxious and high strung…but had no idea that I was that traumatized by the diagnosis…as I was sitting with the general practitioner she said that everything looked great and that if I was having problems coping with Maddie’s diagnosis I should get therapy or even medication…I must have gave her a look…because she could see I was not open to this…not because I do not think I need it…I just cannot commit to a therapy session or a pill…