get a little extra...

I found out around 6 months pregnant that Maddie would need surgery immediately after birth and that she was going to be born with an extra chromosome…I remember the doctors telling us different scenarios but never a conformation of what exactly was going to be done after birth…we knew Maddie did not swallow amniotic fluid…we knew that something was going on with the connections of esophagus, trachea and stomach…but we did not know much else…I remember always asking and getting the we cannot tell until she is born answer…when she was diagnosed with all this the reaction from friends and family was the same…”oh no”…”I am sorry”…”I am so sad for you”…and horrified I am so glad it is not me looks…one person even said that she would not be able to keep going through with the pregnancy…I found that comment relieving and truthful and that was refreshing at the time… but as time went on…and Maddie was born and has grown…something that was sad in the beginning became ordinary…she became just another toddler…she is no longer looked at with sorry eyes by friends or family…but looks of hope and amazement…Maddie seems to bring a smile to everyone…she has an infectious giggle…and mojo that does not quit…through all of this…I hope someone will take away and understand that having a kiddo with a little extra means you get a little extra…and what could be better…everything that I struggled with in the beginning…the unknowns of Maddie’s health…her endless medications and doctors visits…have become a routine…something we just do…and has become our “normal” way of life…last year at this time was some of my darkest days of depression and anxiety…I am thankful for the people who stuck with me and encouraged me to find my way…it is snowing today! and starting to look a lot like Christmas….it is a perfect day and I am happy I got to experience it…