Thursday, November 19, 2009

Be Nice...

The other day talking with my Brother…he made a point that I cannot believe I have never thought of! My Mom was diagnosed at 12 years old with children’s rheumatoid arthritis…back in the day this was not a good thing and sometimes not manageable…but she was linked with the best care at the Mayo Clinic in MN…so she was able to have a full…but NOT pain free life…my Brother said “I am sure Grandma and Grandpa did not handle Moms diagnosis great”…I never thought of that…then I thought of my Aunt and Uncle that have a mentally disabled child (my cousin)… I never thought of anyone else in my family really going through what I am going through…I like to think I am unique and one of a kind! hence why this is so challenging for me…this past week has been raddled with name calling…I saw a post about the “tard supper” and then I read another post about a child calling another child that was born with Ds a “retard”…I am deeply challenged by this…I am sick to my stomach…I was raised not to talk with that language…I do not say nigger, or refer to things as “that’s gay” and I do not say “retard”…how will I teach Maddie to stand up for herself? How will we teach Max to stand up for his sister or others? I remember in middle school being made fun of…and it hurt so bad that I thought my insides were falling out…I remember crying and not wanting to walk out of that classroom…where I knew the boy would be standing waiting to call me names…I could do something about my weight to make the harassment stop…I could pretend it did not bother me and get through it…but I cannot change Maddox, or the color of peoples skin, or there sexual orientation…full circle I wonder how my Grandparents handled my Mom getting made fun of…I am sure she was… her hands were crooked…she could not run…and she just hurt…but she was beautiful…she found my dad…they made me and my brother...and she seemed happy and full of herself...I guess I will teach them like I was taught…JUST BE NICE

1 comment:

  1. Great post. It can be a painful journey at times. While we can share our thoughts on People-First language or not using the R word, there really just are unkind or thoughtless people that will go on saying what they will regardless of how it might feel to someone. I know it's going to kill me personally if anyone ever calls my little guy something disrespectful or hurtful. But I don't want to think what it will do to him. I only pray that I will learn, along with other parents' guidance, the best way to handle it when it happens. Until then, I'll continue to educate and advocate for our kids w/ Ds.